Limerick:
As I walk the distance alone at night
I venture for the nearest light
Wild wind blows throughout the streets
The rhythm of the Earth’s heartbeats
And all along I’m filled with fright.
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About Me
- Small Town Girl
- My name is Lucy. I am a sophomore at the University of Michigan-Dearborn. I'll take the warm weather over the cold any day. :]
I liked you poem! I'm scared of the dark so i related to this. lol The only critic I would say would be with the fourth line.. the word rhythm is throughing me off. To me it not flowing as well as the rest of the poem. A possible suggest could be All along I'm filled with fright, left with only the sound of the earth's heart beat ( That's all i can come up with right now but i will try to come up with something else.) but Good job!
ReplyDeleteI think the rhythm scheme is fine. But I'm not sure I would classify this as a limerick only because traditionally, a limerick is more humorous in form. I like what you wrote because everyone at some point in their lives, can relate to the emotional uncertainties that fear and loneliness can bring out in a person.
ReplyDeleteSorry am posting so late!
ReplyDeleteThe only thing I can comment on is the "Earth's Heartbeats" line.
Maybe you should add an extra syllable in there?
Otherwise I like the fact that I can picture myself walking down a dark alley or something when I read it.